Just because I complain doesn’t mean I’m ungrateful

Guys, know I complain about how hard parenting is and how The Munchkin really gives me a run for my money but that doesn’t mean I’m not grateful for my kids and am fully aware that they are a blessing!

I just realised that I actually complain about him more than is fair to him because he’s only 3 and I think he’s supposed to be annoying and pushing boundaries. 

But the screaming and whining though!!!

But I digress, we waited a really long time before The Munchkin came along to the point that I wasn’t sure we could even have kids. Then I had a miscarriage. So please don’t suffer under the illusion that I’m ungrateful just because I complain sometimes.

Can you imagine what it would be like if parents didn’t have an outlet to vent? Because parenting IS damn hard most days. You’re already barely holding onto the threads of your sanity and venting is sometimes the only way you can keep it together. But this parenting gig also hella rewarding. 

Like last night when I had The Potato sat in my lap and The Munchkin under my arm as I read The Snail and The Whale to them. Or when The Munchkin pulls The Husband and I close for group hugs “like a family”. Or when he lies next to his sister and makes her laugh.

Yes, he also drives me batty with his tantrums, screaming and bouncing off the walls but he is still a joy.

The Husband described them so perfectly yesterday. He said:

The Munchkin is like a roller coaster and The Potato is like a chilled day at the river bank. Both enjoyable activities bit very different. Basically, she’s Jonkershoek and he’s Ratanga Junction.

So yes, I complain about my kids but I also love them to death.


  1. Melissa Javan

    March 2, 2017 at 4:50 pm

    It’s amazing how different siblings’ personalities can be.
    I guess it’s okay to complain sometimes – just don’t make your children feel bad about themselves, or hear bad stuff, because they can remember things forever.

    Your kids look so adorable.

    1. Zayaan Schroeder

      March 2, 2017 at 7:47 pm

      Yeah, very true. I never complain about him when his around. It’s usually just lamenting about how tired I am or how he didn’t listen and that I actually just don’t know what to do with him anymore type of thing. Usually to other parents who can commiserate.

      1. Melissa Javan

        March 2, 2017 at 8:24 pm

        I know what you mean – I am out of ideas with my kid too. She is 1. That’s why I’m happy she goes to creche and I go to work – another way to stimulate ourselves.

  2. Fatima

    March 3, 2017 at 8:12 am

    I may not comment often but I read all your posts. As you know I’ve been a single mom for most of my kids lives and believe it or not, they never threw tantrums so I can’t relate to that but I do feel for you. Anyone who thinks that you do not love your kids unconditionally is just stupid. We are allowed to rant and vent all we want. ALL parents do but the difference is that they do not have a blog to ‘air’ their experiences. Not once have I judged you nor do I have any advice for you but what I can tell you is that the constant sibling bickering is another thing you have to deal with until they are about 18. This drove me bloody insane.

    *hugs* and be strong!

  3. Tara

    March 3, 2017 at 9:04 am

    After a particularly fraught bedtime. he snuggled into my hair and said “You’re the best mommy ever. I love you”.

    I am grateful everyday for his forgiveness

  4. Cindy Alfino

    March 3, 2017 at 1:28 pm

    I freaking love you hubbies summary of your kids – it’s adorable!!

  5. Laila

    March 3, 2017 at 3:48 pm

    I just love that you said this because I too also find that I complain alot about Aaliyah to others and really its just a way of getting rid of built up frustrations. Those who judge either don’t have kids or have angels for kids but I totally feel you Zayaan. Venting makes us better parents and pretending to be living a fairytale when you not is just wrong…our kids look up to us…so may you always be as honest as you….it makes me feel ok knowing I’m not the only one going thro this. xo

  6. Mymona

    March 7, 2017 at 11:15 am

    I also feel the need to vent alot…. because having a 3 year old and a toddler is alredy a huge job (and dont even talk about cooking, cleaning, etc.). Alot of the times hubby needs to remind me that they are just kids and learning to find their place and that i shouldnt be too hard on them. and by complaining and venting it also allows people to give you different ways of doing this or giving you a different perspective on life. and more importantly… venting helps to put you in a better frame of mind when you deal with your kids. imagine if we bottled up all our frustrations.

    Most of the time after complaining and venting… i realise how cute and funny it ACTUALLY is and how amazing it is to have MY KIDS with such strong and determined personalities. My problem is that I only come to this realisation when they sleeping. lol!

    you are really an AWESOME mom and you inspire me alot with what you do and the way you do things. The important thing is that you become AWARE of your actions and always try to be better next the time.

  7. Meet the Mommy Blogger: Zayaan Mollagee of Surviving the Madness - My Spreadsheet Brain

    March 2, 2018 at 1:05 pm

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