Growing up is a funny thing
Growing up is weird. You don’t see it happening, but then one day you wake up and you’re on the verge of turning 33 which sounded like the oldest thing in the world when you were 19.
About a week ago I remembered that I used to have a LiveJournal blog between 2005 and 2009. Back when I poured my heart and soul onto the pages of the internet.
The level of oversharing is shocking but the first thing I did was check that I was at least a little smart and I did actually make it a private journal. At least I had the common sense to do that.
It was a place where I ranted and raved. I was so angry, stupid and sad. It was a very dramatic time of my life and I was going to delete the whole stupid thing because it’s embarrassing but it’s also a reminder of how much I’ve grown as a person.
To read back and see just how pathetic I was and how I made excuses for how badly I was treated is so flipping astounding and it makes me realise just how fortunate I am that The Husband walked into my life. He really was a turning point in a very tumultuous life. Sometimes I wish I had a time machine to just go back in time to shake some sense into myself. Wow hey.
Life now is a lot less dramatic and while we all managed to come out of that shit storm still being friends, we don’t actually see each other as much as we used to. It’s not for lack of trying though, kids just make life so flipping busy and tiring.
We saw each other if not every day then at least every weekend. We were in our early 20s, we had nothing better to do.
Reading old journals is always such a trip. My writing and language have changed so much. I’ve changed so much. Although when I said as much to The Husband this is the gif he sent me:
But when you live and grow with another person you don’t notice it what much until you stop and think about it.
So even though those journals are cringe worthy, I don’t think I’ll delete it just yet. In fact I think I might just start a new private journal because in another 10 years time I’d like to remember who I was now.
Does anyone still journal in this modern age of oversharing?